Hey, everybody. Thought I’d drop an update on you, as things are getting exciting here in writer world!

Well, OK…not that exciting. I’m still mostly staying at home, chugging away at one book after another…but there’s been some real progress that I’m at least pretty excited about.

First, and maybe most important: the time for querying is nigh. That’s right: I recently took some time to compile a list of agents, wrote up a query letter and a synopsis, and am now making final preparations to start sending query letters. Yep, after I think seven years, I’m finally going to start shopping one of my books around again.

Now, part of me is a little nervous. Because, well, what if I don’t make it? What if I send out wave upon wave of queries, and the result is exactly what it was back when I was querying my fourth novel Mecha, or that brief period when I was querying the original version of Kosan? What if all I get is an unending wall of silence? Any rejection is discouraging, of course, even when you’re as experienced at getting them as I am. What’s the worst, though, is constantly just hearing nothing, or just getting form rejections, which are almost worse than nothing. If any of you reading this have tried job-hunting recently, you know what that’s like. All that effort, all that waiting, and nothing to show for it.

At the same time, though, another part of me is ecstatic. I’m finally stepping out again. After being discouraged from querying back in 2018, then plugging along for the next several years, not confident enough in my skills yet to query again…then finally saving up enough money to hire an editor in 2022, only for the feedback to be thoroughly mixed…then taking that feedback, making all the improvements I can, only to hire another editor in 2024 and for that feedback to also be mixed…and then intermittently submitting short stories to magazines during that time, and getting no response…it’s all accumulated over time. And now, all of a sudden, it’s been seven years since I’ve queried a novel, and I almost can’t remember what it’s like to take that step. It feels scary in a way because I’m not sure I’m prepared enough. I’m still not sure I’ve learned enough. But at what point should I be sure I have learned enough? After all, many agents and most big publishers offer editing services. The Ravage (the book I’m querying) will go through more edits before it (hopefully, eventually) gets published.

And I’m tired of waiting. I was in the front half of my twenties when I queried the first time. Now I’ve recently passed 30. While I’m still in the front half of the average life expectancy, a) there are no guarantees in life, and b) I’m still much further along than I was seven years ago. And even though I still don’t feel ready, I’ve learned so much. I’m a much better writer than I was seven years ago; I can say that with confidence.

Thus, I think it’s time. At the very least, querying again will tell me where I’m at. And if it doesn’t work out…well, as I’ve said before, that’ll be tough for a while. But, like with every other setback I’ve endured in my 15 years going after this dream, I’ll learn what I can from it and move on. And do my best to quash the feeling that I’m Captain Ahab, chasing after the white whale.

Before I go, a quick word on the writing itself. For much of August and September—after Bezok’s Wrath ground to a halt—I sort of agonized over what to work on next. Blueblood 2 was the pick at first, but I was having trouble really getting into a groove with that book, and so for a while I wondered if I should work on something else. The Ravage sequel would be timely. Re-writing Kosan II could be an option. Or I could even go back to Usi, that sprawling epic that’s taken me literal years to finish a draft of. But in the end, I did decide to go back to Blueblood 2. And, even though it’s happened slowly, I have built up a bit of momentum with that one. I’m writing 2000+ words more days than not now, and was past the 30,000-word mark last time I checked (out of the maybe 150,000 words it’ll take to finish, although my estimated word counts do have a way of growing out of control on me). It’s usually around the 100,000-word mark that I get stuck on a book (Bezok’s Wrath was at around 98,000 when I stopped), so if that trend continues, I have a good month or two before Blueblood 2 vexes me. Anyway, that’ll be all for tonight. I’ll be sure to post more updates on the query process, and maybe post a few more Cork stories over the next few weeks. Until then, as always…have fun, stay safe and keep reading.